Dealing With a Suspicious College Roommate

You've moved into a new college dorm with a new roommate, and at first everything seems fine. She respects you, picks up her laundry and lets you know when you've missed a phone call. But then you start to notice that things are a little strange.

What do you do? Here are some suggestions for dealing with a suspicious college roommate.

Get to know each other. One of the best ways to avoid mistrust or suspecting each other of wrongdoing is to get to know each other early in the school year. If you are from different backgrounds or social circles, some of your habits may seem a bit odd, but understanding each other will help to eliminate this awkwardness.

Set ground rules. There is nothing wrong with setting rules at the beginning of your school year establishing places in the room that are private or items that are not community property. Setting these boundaries ahead of time is a good way to protect yourself in case your roommate should prove to be less than trustworthy.

Don't jump to conclusions. If something that your roommate does seems out of the ordinary or weird, remember that you just met him recently and that there may be a reasonable explanation for his behavior. If whatever he's doing concerns you enough, casually bring it up in conversation. Ask him how things have been going, or ask him if anything is wrong. Give him an opportunity to open up to you.

Keep track of suspicious activities. If you begin to notice patterns of suspicious behavior that you feel might be cause for concern, pay attention to how often they happen and other details. Note any strange people that keep showing up at the room or write down occasions when your roommate receives strange phone calls or comes home much later than usual. Once you have kept track of these details for a while, determine if there is any pattern that could mean that something is going on.

Know your rights. If you suspect your roommate of committing a crime, such as stealing or being involved with drugs, know what your rights are as a roommate. Most colleges include information on campus security and crime prevention in their new student orientation materials. If this information does not tell you what you need to know, contact campus police or the housing office to find out how to handle a roommate that you suspect of a crime.

Protect yourself. If your roommate's suspicious behavior threatens you or makes you feel genuinely unsafe, take action. If you feel you have legitimate concern for your safety and well-being, consult your resident adviser about what you should do. Your resident adviser may be able to offer suggestions about relocating or finding a different roommate and can advise you on how to report your roommate's suspicious activity to the proper authorities.

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